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Are your kids getting nervous or excited about going back to school in June? Some are getting anxious ...

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1 in 7 adoptions in England in 2019 were to same-sex couples. But LGBT+ applicants still have an expectation of discrimination. 

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A word from...... James Lawrence, Communications & Engagement Manager

As schools in England and Wales prepare to close for the summer, some of our LGBT+ adoptive parents and foster carers thoughts turn to how to make the most of it for their children. This is more of a challenge this year if lockdown meant your child has been at home continuously since the end of March. There is also the issue of preparing for the return to school, but we’ll cover that later this month, to support our members in Scotland – where the summer holidays start and end earlier than in England.

While there’s no ‘one size fits all’ approach you can take with parenting an adopted or foster child over the summer months, here are some ideas that may help:

Find a routine to the days and stick to it. For some adopted and foster children the absence of routine and boundaries can be extremely distressing. If bedtimes and mealtimes shift because of the break try to revert to the times they need to occur when schools reopen either a week or a fortnight before the end of the holiday. Some children really benefit from being able to see – either on a paper calendar, or for the tech fans on their phone calendar – when deviations are going to occur to the routine.

Accept that your routines may need to change. If you usually pop to the supermarket for a big shop on Tuesday morning when your child’s in school, try investigating whether you can book an online delivery instead. At the start of lockdown these slots were extremely hard to obtain but some supermarkets now offer openings with availability four weeks ahead. Few adopted and foster children cope well queuing to take part in the supermarket shop or waiting outside while the shopping is done.

There can be the temptation to seek out every attraction to fill the diary up. However, some adopted and foster children will respond better if their holiday time is spent at home. Visit your local council’s website to see what activities – if any – they are running that are more low key and may appeal to your child. With lockdown gradually lifting try to avoid the temptation to flock to sites as they reopen, the stress and volume of visitors may be too great for your child.

Some children may take great comfort in spending their time watching children’s television or surfing on the internet. Neither is harmful in itself, but be aware with the former that if your child suddenly starts consistently watches programming intended for younger age children this may be indicative of them regressing and seeking comfort. If this is the case you may want to explore with them what’s causing concern. Similarly, with some children who spend a lot of time on the internet it’s helpful to check that the sites they visit are suitable for them. With adopted and foster children it’s possible they will immerse themselves online to distract themselves from issues causing them concern – which can lead to challenging behaviour once the distraction is removed.

Ultimately, the best way forward is the one that works best for your child. Take care that the focus also includes your needs as well – you can’t provide the best care for your child if your needs are never met. If you’re a Gold or Silver member you can also log in and seek additional support from other members – just click on the purple buddy icon, log-in and go to the forums.

1 in 7

adoptions in England in 2019 were to same-sex  couples

3 in 4

 New Family Social adopters consider adopting siblings


The total number of children in foster care in England

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